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I wrote a great piece today

March 19, 2018

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But it’s gone, in a flash, into the inaccessible bowells of my tablet.

I could probably find it, but that is quite the task at Level 23 after 50 minutes and 365 calories. After 355 days straight.

So I send you this pic, and ask you: Do you understand gravity?

No one does. They understand it as well as I understand where those 600 words just went.

I know there is an IPad, WordPress, the keyboard, and my blog, but the “how” of that piece’s creation is just cause and effect, not understood by me.

Just like gravity.

But a few hundred folk will see the piece. The entire universe uses gravity. And this small part of it has no clue, after untold measurements, of how gravity is the one, overwhelming force on everything, everywhere.

For me, it is the same with Faith. It has no reason to be. I wish I could relegate joy to a synaptic, chemical concoction that I take. But I have known people who tried that. It does not work.

We cannot create gravity. It is there in everything, everything, around us. Just like joy. It is unreasonable because we cannot justify it, hell, we cannot understand it. It just is.

Beyond the local pull of earth’s gravity, we may seem to have no gravity: we may feel the control is gone. No, it’s just quieter. Less present. But it is there, always. Like Grace.

I wish I could live the life where I defined happiness and joy and did them. Others I know tried that. It did not work for them either.

Who knows if I am happy – I guess I am. But I know I am loved. I know that the giant forces need only one understanding: love. I am good with that – many are pretty lovable. But is not easy to accept being loved.

None of us can use the tally sheets we employ every day: money, praise, power, health, even love, but accepting I earned any of it is pretty impossible for me.

Even in Lent.

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