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Flaw Flourishes

January 30, 2020

My vision ended my application to be considered for the Navy ROTC program. My vision was 20-40, and the program, during the Vietnam War that was still raging, only wanted those who could be pilots, thus needed 20-20 vision for consideration. I asked for a waiver, and was denied.

So my parents paid for most of my college tuition, and I was a deep sea scallop fisherman for the rest.

In that eye evaluation, I was told I had a “bad astigmatism”. I mostly did not wear the glasses I was prescribed until I drove, then wearing them was a very good idea, but my eyes never degraded, over 40 years.

Then things changed.

I began to see more clearly when I was not using my glasses, and less clearly when I was wearing them.

I was told that I should go to the eye doctor despite the improvement, so I did. My doctor friends told me that the improvement was normal, but I could begin to need magnification to read or draw. So I went. Tests abounded.

Evidence is not expectation. There is no rationalization. No fear, no faith. It is what it is. The tests revealed that my individual eyes are pretty lame. Fuzzy letters, lack of clarity. Yikes.

But together, their flaws were simply overcome, and I could see dramatically more. Why?

“Your eyes work together.” said the doctor.

My eyes are sentient? They overcome flaws by “working” together? But they report to one brain. Seeing pictures showing the inside of my eyeballs the insane complexity of the entire assembly merely confirms the impossibility of its origin, and my outcome.

But more, I asked the doctor when my close vision will fail.

“Maybe never.”


I had thought the reciprosity of seeing worse long was to slowly erode my perfect up-close focus. But the long vision is not failing, even getting better, and the close-up vision is unchanged.


“Your astigmatism may simply prevent any change in your close focus.”

A flaw creates facility.

I have no idea why, I guess I could try to understand, but I am behind in most things, and I had someone who knows declare an probable outcome.

My flaws have hurt. Sometimes deamatically.

But flaws make us.

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